Free pass for U2 bus service automatically installed on all Apple iPhones

whip satire u2 bus

In a bizarre move by First Bus, a free pass for the U2 bus has been pre-installed on all Apple devices. The service running between UoB’s Clifton and Langford campuses is now available for use by millions of apple users across the world, regardless of their taste in busses.

Although many people seem to be thrilled by their ability to
freely move between the UoB campuses without charge, it has been noted that a
large proportion of the owners of such Apple devices will not necessarily see
the benefit.

Paula Lòpez from Guaranda, Ecuador, told The Whip: “I’m delighted that this bus
pass has been added to my phone, it’s a real relief to not have to worry about
paying my fare. I’ve never actually been to Europe, let alone Bristol, but I’m
bound to go now. I can seamlessly transfer between the city’s university
campuses without calling upon my wallet, so easy!”

Despite the largely positive reception, some have been more
critical of this new policy. Craig Waites, a University of Bristol Vet student,
commented:

“No one is asking for this, least of all Vet students. Does
the university not realise we all have Land Rovers? UoB is once again
squandering our nine grand a year on nonsense no one will use.”

He continued, “I’m not bothered about the exclusion of
Android owners, God knows they deserve it, it’s more the frivolous investment
in a bus service we aren’t interested in, and then wasting more money making it
free to everyone with a sodding iPhone.”

It still remains unclear whether the bus pass was
intentionally or inadvertently installed on all iPhones and iPads. When contacted,
Apple declined to give a statement.

Bono was not asked for comment, but left The Whip a string of voicemails
containing only the phrase “I’m fucking suing”.