Muslim pilgrim and OAP unite in confusion at Mecca Batty Bingo event

An Islamic student and a retired receptionist were left baffled last week when they realised their interpretation of the Mecca ‘Batty Bingo’ was somewhat wide of the mark.

Meryl Cranbrook, 78, and Mohammed Rahman, 21, expected a night with friends and a holy pilgrimage site respectively, but were instead caught up in the pandemonium of the bi-annual event last Tuesday.

The Whip caught up with the unlikely duo in the wake of it.

‘It was really quite something,’ wheelchair-bound Meryl remarked to our reporter, ‘I was expecting a quiet evening with Brenda and Pat, but within seconds of my arrival I’d been pelted with Tangfastics by a dwarf and had a penis drawn on my forehead in a marker pen.’

‘I thought it didn’t look like a particularly holy site, but flights to Saudi Arabia are pretty pricey so I thought I’d at least give it a go,’ explained Mohammed.

‘I was a bit disappointed when I realised that it didn’t count as a pilgrimage, but I was even more incensed when I saw that it was a tenner for a four pack of tinnies. I accept that I made a mistake about the event but they’re mistaken if they think I’m shelling out for that. Total bollocks.’

Despite the event not quite being what they expected, the two decided to make a night of it, and were spotted in high spirits whilst sharing a table at the front, particularly during the drag show.

The Whip later learnt that both won Batty Bingo prizes – a twelve pack of VKs for Mohammed and a flashy new BMX for Meryl.