‘Dissertations are the worst’ says student seemingly unaware of the Yemen crisis

Worried male student with hand in hair using laptop

Final year history student Colin Bramble caused controversy today with a statement implying that nothing could possibly be worse than having to write a 10,000 word assignment.

The young scholar, while well versed in historical atrocities such as the Khmer Rouge and the Rwandan genocide, seems to be completely oblivious towards the catastrophic situation currently engulfing the Yemeni people.

“Dissertations are such a pain in the arse,” Colin murmured, “ten thousand words is a joke. This is the worst,” said the person ignorant of the 14 million people at risk of famine due to Saudi Arabia-led blockades.

One must surely presume Colin is either blissfully unaware of the humanitarian disaster unfolding in the Yemen, or a selfish, naïve tosspot unable to muster a single ounce of empathy.

We caught up with professor and conflict expert Cynthia Kahn to hear her thoughts.

“It’s a toughy. On one hand the war crimes being carried out in Yemen every day combined with the appalling levels of international neglect for this fundamentally mad-made crisis are objectively worse than an extended study into a subject of your choice. On the other hand, Edward Boyle can be really lonely at night, especially when all your mates are at the pub.”

At press time, Colin appears to have changed his mind and now believes that hangovers are the worst thing in the world.