A heartbreaking cognitive analysis has been launched by a team of ‘totally mystified’ clinical psychologists into a Love Saves the Day reveller who failed to upload a fun, summery photo of the event this afternoon.
According to Bristol University Psychology Professor Aaron Chowdry, the student was literally the only attendee of the day festival who resisted flaunting their narcotic-fueled day-out online.
The Whip spoke to him on Monday evening.
‘Whilst the identity of the 20-year-old affected by this extraordinary psychotic episode cannot be announced for legal reasons, we are certain that their failure to post anything on social media within 12 hours of this day festival means they are not in a sound state of mind.
‘One need only look at the actions of their peers, who universally popped a sunny, happy, glittery snapshot onto Instagram, to see the astounding nature of this particular mental breakdown. No-one in our field saw it coming – it’s a truly seminal case for behavioural psychology.
‘Going forward, the student is to be interned at Broadmoor high-security hospital in Berkshire to restrain them from committing any similar unholy cultural malignancies. The staff there are concerned, but have suggested a long-term recovery may still be a possibility.
‘This individual’s deafening silence on the photo-sharing platform was a social blitzkrieg that will no doubt put them into the history books. We are all shocked, but to be completely honest, totally amazed.
‘It’s now about ensuring their welfare, and trying to prevent them from not constantly broadcasting their social life online just one day at a time.’