Student launches global non-profit to avoid revision

Second year Sociology student Marcus Clevedon announced Friday evening week that he would be launching a new charity with global reach to tackle the problems of poverty, famine and global warming all at once.

He explained the plans at a press conference.

‘A lot of people think that these problems are separate, but that’s why we’re not really tackling them effectively. I realised that they were connected and so the only way to really tackle any one of them is to tackle all of them at the same time.’

The ambitious endeavour has already gained support from many world renowned charitable figures such as Bill Gates and J.K. Rowling.

The famed author described the endeavour as ‘bold and ambitious’, before going on to say that Clevedon would have to ‘dedicate his every waking moment to this effort’ for it to succeed.

Rebecca Jones, one of Clevedon’s close friends, responded with irritation, saying ‘he’s always pulling shit like this, before the January exams he tried to become an Olympic gymnast despite the fact that he can’t do a handstand.’

‘I bet he’ll still get a better mark than me.’

Luke Cox

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