Outrage as entire road’s gender and race assumed

The popular road has yet to comment.

Hundreds of students gathered on Park Street yesterday morning to picket City Hall, united in fury that Bristol’s administrators had assumed both the gender and ethnicity of Whiteladies Road.

Protesters took to the streets to claim that the City Planning Committee was wildly out of touch, suggesting instead the Buzzfeed-friendly alternative name: ‘gender-fluid-and-completely-devoid-of-any-colour Road’.

The Whip was on the front line of the protest. James Spencer, a second year Social Policy student and fervent picketer, had this to say:

‘It’s not the 70’s anymore, OK? You can’t just assume these things. The Romans didn’t and they built some fantastically straight roads, in the sense of their physical structure of course, not their sexuality. I promise I did not just assume the sexuality of a road, I really didn’t.’

Some of the other protesters were spotted with various signs saying ‘ROADS NOT CHODES’, ‘#toolstation’ and ‘C’MON GUYS, GET STREETWISE’.

The popular road, which bisects the Redland and Clifton areas, has yet to comment.

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