Man of the hour Hugh Brady has today approached The Whip to report his genuine exhilaration at the colossal number of student emails flooding his inbox this morning.
The Vice Chancellor of the University of Bristol relayed his excitement in a phone interview with The Whip. An extract appears below.
‘I must say, it’s a real ego boost. Each ‘ping-ding’ I hear coming from my Gmail feels like a warm hug from another adoring student.
‘My inbox hasn’t been this busy since Ashley Madison closed down! I must say, my BNOC status seems well and truly confirmed.
‘I’m everywhere – my face and name on the placards is great too, “inHUGHmane” and “Shady Brady” are my personal favourites – so silly!
‘These students at UoB really just want to get to know me, and are reaching out for a friendly chat. It’s so sweet!’
‘I haven’t gotten around to actually reading any of them, sadly, because I’ve been totally hung up on this whole Wills Memorial thing.
‘I’ve asked so many people, but haven’t received any satisfactory answers. Do you know? Are the Halls named after the building or the other way round? It’s doing my head in!
‘Luckily, I have a long and well-funded retirement ahead of me to consider that and other questions, including the following:
‘Why am I only the VICE-Chancellor? Surely I’m like the headmaster of Bristol, and Sir Paul Nurse must be like, I dunno, a governor or something? Weird, no? Does this institution have no respect for traditional hierarchical nomenclature?
‘Also, if Newton was right and every action has an equal and opposite reaction, where the hell is Blackgentleman’s Street? Or, for that matter, why are there no clubs in Bristol named Free Trade Agreement or New Hat Tribunals? The Physics Department told me Isaac was definitely correct about all this, so riddle me that!
‘Finally, my name sort of sounds like Huge Gravy. Despite this, on my last six visits to a Toby Carvery they have given me a pauper’s boat of that warm brown nectar. Why does no-one ever respect me?’
‘Let me know if you have any ideas!’