According to The Whip’s sources, Burst Radio has experienced catastrophic technical difficulties after a seventh listener tuned in to one of their weekly shows. After being requested for comment, the student media platform apologised to their audience.
“Jemima, Mark, Mark G, Emily and the gang – we’re so sorry. We had been gearing up for an unprecedented increase in listeners for months after our hyperlink was accidentally posted to that Reddit water-balloon thread. We got a click late last night, and it overwhelmed our servers.”
Fortunately for the station however, an investigation has revealed that apart from the seven disappointed students listening in when Burst went off-air, literally no-one actually noticed recording cease.
Interestingly, presenters have reported that the broadcasting issues experienced have raised Burst’s profile ‘beyond anything we thought was possible’. New state-of-the-art software is being installed that will allow the university radio show to handle up to 15 listeners an hour in preparation for next week’s predicted audience increase.
We caught up with the hosts of one of Burst’s flagship programs – PintChat – to get the inside scoop on the situation. Unfortunately, the interview proved to be a rare opportunity to advertise that neither presenter was willing to miss:
“So where does Burst go from here after the listener capacity issues its been experiencing?”
“Basically, we decided a few weeks ago that we are pretty fucking funny. We’ve just moved into a house with six other lads and the banter has been good man, really good. It’s basically like an unscripted Friends crossed with Peep Show crossed with Louis Theroux – you know, cos of the pints and identity crises.”
“That sounds great, but we’d like to know what’s going on behind the scenes here after all of the broadcasting problems this week?”
“Last week we actually cut our mate’s hair on the air. It was fucking bless man, really funny if you know the guy and were actually in the recording booth at the time. Hair went everywhere man, fucking everywhere. Look out for him – he’s called Toby and he’s got a shlid.”
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