Earlier today, it emerged that a rag-tag bunch of UoB first years have little else in common but the crippling fear of freezing in Bristol’s streets.
The four freshers came to the startling revelation after their ninth conversation about the weather in the space of a week. One of the frightened foursome, Jack Murray, was the first to show concern.
“At first our lacklustre conversation made sense. The weather is a great jumping off point. It’s there all around us, it’d be pure idiocy not to mention it.” He opened, “But it was only when we tried to discuss other things and came up empty that I knew next year would be a real struggle.”
Several attempts have been made to venture into other topics, such as university work and cooking, but to no avail.
Sources indicate conversation once ventured into music taste, but this was shut down instantly owing to the excessively diverse range of music enjoyed by the group. The divide between hip-hop and R&B proved too large and irreconcilable.
Resident Abi Kennedy expressed frustration that the group had not told her that her love of all things Reggaeton was not welcome.
“It was a real shock. I thought for sure that the others would enjoy the ninth reprisal of ‘Gasolina’ by Daddy Yankee, but apparently they were just annoyed.”
The Whip attempted to approach the other two members of the house for comment; but was met only with trivial comments regarding the weather forecast, and asking if it was too warm to be wearing a jacket and a jumper.