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Corbyn’s house party ruined as backstabbing mates leave early

Life imitating art?

The party can be a complex thing, a disparate combination of friends, acquittances and rivals, prone to fall apart. Indeed, in one treacherous turn of events, prominent member of the Labour Society, Jeremy Corbyn, has been left red faced after his so-called ‘friends’ elected to depart from his soiree sooner than expected.

Not the most popular of chaps, Mr. Corbyn had emerged as a surprising house party host, but, despite his penchant for jam, cheese and Marxist theory, he had still anticipated a decent turnout.

Alas, it was not to be, and those who did arrive were quick to make haste, The Whip can reveal, having spoken to one such independent minded defector, Henrietta Sidling.

“Christ alive it was awful,” she began, clearly exasperated, “I just wasn’t really feeling it, you know. The vibe was really off, and he had invited all the wrong people, it was never going to work!

“Don’t get me started on his Islington friends from home… it felt like an old men’s club, I’m just glad I got out of there when I did!”

Indeed, it appears Henrietta and her gang had been harbouring doubts about Mr. Corbyn’s capabilities for some time.

“Me and the girls had tried telling everybody Jeremy wasn’t the right man to run a successful party, but hey, they wouldn’t listen. He’s got no experience, no organisational skills and very little personability. The DJ was shite too.”

Controversially, and to the dismay of Corbyn loyalists, Henrietta has since taken to social media to announce plans for a rival party, next weekend.

 

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