Magic Bus linked to rise in anxiety as students agonise over whether to say ‘Thanks’ or ‘Cheers’ to driver

The recent drop in the number of students utilising the Magic Bus is because it induces anxiety, studies have shown.

It appears that throughout the duration of time spent travelling, students find the torture of deciding whether to say ‘Thanks’ or ‘Cheers’ to the driver so unbearable they would simply rather walk.

Rob Anderson, third year undergrad at UoM detailed the intensity of the problem. “The minute I step on the bus, my mind is in total turmoil. Every day I am faced with the same painful decision: will it be ‘thanks’ or ‘cheers’ or a silent-mouth-widen?

“‘Cheers’ seems more friendly, so I often go for that. Once I settle for the expression of gratitude which feels most appropriate, I start psyching myself up for the delivery. The anticipation of articulation makes me so stressed. God, it’s awful.

“In comparison, my dissertation is a breeze. Last week, the situation reached crisis point. I said ‘Chanks’ to the driver as I departed. I just can’t take it anymore.”

The Magic Bus company is yet to make a statement on the crisis.