‘Who’s going?’ asks unashamed feelings-hurter

Unabashed bastard.

A heart was broken this morning in Clifton as an unabashed meanie asked, “Who’s going?” in response to a pub invitation. The gut-wrenching pseudo-rejection shocked housemates, who were reportedly unaware that their friend of two years was an utter bastard.

It is thought that the statement has come as a part of a wider trend of sober ingrates blatantly flouting social norms. The Whip caught up with the anonymous speculative organiser of the pub visit.

“It was just so out of the blue. I’d honestly thought that my housemate enjoyed the company of the friends he’d elected to live with. I know we spend most of our time together, but isn’t that the point?

“It was the nonchalance with which he cast us aside that hurt the most. To know that they mentally auction us for the best price is a real blow, but to do so with such ambivalence takes some doing. It’s not just an internal, silent auction; they are literally screaming for the rooftops, ‘Going once to the one I don’t really know but seems to have a mild cocaine problem and that’s cool!’”

Another housemate told us that they too upset to inform the bastard in question that ‘Nick from classics, and cool Adam’ were going, for fear of receiving confirmation that they were indeed considered little more than a spare part.

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