Exam season sees many students attempting to desperately revise through the sweltering 16-degree heat, fighting the desire to scroll on Twitter, eat, sleep, drink or do literally anything else. Emily Howser is one of these reprobates, with her most recent Instagram showing all the signs of a student doing no work.
Her recent post, captioned “working hard or hardly working?”, depicts some messy scrawling she grandiosely termed ‘notes’ surrounded by several empty Pret cups and the sigil of any insufferable social library dweller: the remnants of a chicken and avocado wrap.
Her friend, sat opposite in the photo, poses cutely, eyes brimming with the false sense of achievement which inevitably comes from any trip to the library, regardless of the complete absence of doing anything remotely academic.
Emily has been in the library for the past three days and all she’s managed to accomplish, we are told, is order and return 14 items from ASOS. Her revision for the philosophy exam she has in two days hasn’t started and the ‘notes’ in the photo are copied directly from Wikipedia.
Emily, however, confidently told us that she’ll “just make it up on the day” because “it’s all subjective anyway innit” before returning to mindless indulgence of Instagram’s explore page.
Looking around the library the same case can be seen in most, if not all, students sitting at their desk, often next to rows of empty chairs held in reserve by trivial objects.
Our reporter has yet to see any studying actually occur within the Library and must warn any student striving for a 2:2 or higher to avoid the cesspit and actually do some work somewhere else.