Self-defined lothario and erstwhile computer scientist student, Damien Ratcliffe (19), was shocked to discover that his flirtatious prowess exceeded levels that even he thought possible when he shocked an arts into a state of temporary amnesia after showing off his new customised battle dice.
Ratcliffe reportedly flashed his die at Eleanor Scott (22) as she passed by on her way to hot yoga. This marks a stark shift in the social policy of the computer scientist community. Typically, romantic tricks and sexual notions remained the preserve of the better-dressed, un-smelling masses. Perhaps fatigued after a night of hard dungeoning and dragoning; perhaps delirious after some vicious java compiling – we don’t know for sure why this bizarre behaviour has emerged.
“I just wanted her to appreciate the complexity of my numerical rolling piece,” Ratcliffe mumbled to our correspondent.
Passersby recall how Scott’s immediate confusion quickly turned to amnesia as she struggled to recall her digits. Just why and how had Ratcliffe managed such a feat remains unclear. Some speculation remains as to the legitimacy of Scott’s memory loss.
Professional bystander Greg Dunnet had this to say:
“Frankly I’m not convinced she forgot her number. I mean the poor kid was rolling that thing all around the place. Tough to realise she wasn’t interested without looking at her in the eye, I guess.”
Some expressed relief that Ratcliffe was restrained enough not to expose unassuming female students to what is commonly known within the DnD community (not to be confused with DnB or BDSM) as one’s wider ‘dice hoard’.
The University has asked that students remain vigilant and aware of anyone channelling the powerful tantric powers of board games; and to escort them quickly towards the nearest computer suite for ‘debugging’.
Scott has declined to comment.
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