A Liberal Arts student has revealed this week that they spent a record total of 4 hours writing their latest assignment, with most of that time dedicated to removing the hyperlinks.
The student in question, third-year Libby Dosser, managed to find the time to speak to The Whip between reading her Sally Rooney book, learning Esperanto and the dozen other things she’s decided to take up to fill the void left by her 2 hours contact time per week.
“It was a tough process and I found that I had to take regular breaks. I was worried about getting an RSI from hitting ‘backspace’ too much, so I decided to play it safe and only spend half an hour deleting hyperlinks per day.”
Her essay topic, ‘Do you reckon Hegel would have smoked weed if he was alive today?’ was one that, by her own admission, Libby had not given much thought to previously, but once she had opened Wikipedia, it did not take her long to fill her word-count.
“I never used to take so much care with my work, but I once had a close call when I was super busy and didn’t have time to check my essay properly before submitting. I was called into a meeting with my personal tutor to explain why so many of my sentences ended with random numbers in square brackets. Luckily my tutor takes quite a relaxed view of plagiarism, insisting that ‘we were all young once’ and as long I promised to be a bit more careful about hiding it next time, they agreed to increase my mark from 68 to 74.”