Johnson not sure which family to isolate with
In an unfortunate turn of events, the virile Prime Minister has a difficult decision to make. Being of sound mind and ailed body, he must decide which of his numerous families to stay with.
Sources close to the PM say he has made a 100 strong shortlist and is ‘whittling’ it down presently.
- 1Greta delivers earth-shattering Motion techno set during Bristol visit
- 2Third year revises so hard that ‘chilled study beats’ becomes actual music taste
- 3North London fresher’s attempt to start anew ruined as entire sixth form moves to Bristol
- 4Fresher dismayed to find cacti, scratch map and wall hanging not actually substitute for personality
- 5Breaking: Theresa May starts filling out extenuating circumstances form