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‘Tall, dark, and handsome’, boasts smoker’s lung hinge profile

He’s not like other lungs!

We were minding our own business when the merrymaking of a particularly naughty lung caught our attention – reports have it that the respiratory organ has been laying it on thick like phlegm across the dating world. Out of sheer disgust and curiosity The Whip went to investigate.

Aside from the strikingly accurate, super original and satisfying rule-of-three description, the profile also advertises the lung’s aversion to pineapple on pizza and its especially unique love of dogs. He’s not like other lungs!

But it’s working – the likes are rolling in and this alveoli’s cool exterior proves that in this day and age it’s not about wearing your heart on your sleeve but in fact wearing your self-inflicted carbon-esque charred flesh on your lung- you can even achieve this exact look by consuming no less than forty saucy ciggys a day. “Woaoaoh, mysterious lung, I want to get close to you!” says one rib.

“I respect it – lonely lungs club is a real thing and actually quite sad” says a fellow Hinge member and  kidney. “Personally, monogamy isn’t my thing. I’m actually on a wee mission to build an entire urinary system and I’m on the hunt for a thick efficient bladder.” We wish you luck Kidney!

So, is this legendary lung the organ for you? Or is the pesky nicotine addiction a bit of a tar-n off?

“I don’t drink, so there’s that.” wheezes the lung, even though it physically can’t.

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