With Leeds officially today hurtling full speed out of Lockdown into the brick wall that is Tier 3, many residents are looking forward to their newfound freedoms.
Some residents in fact, were so excited at the prospect of an end to Lockdown 2: Re-locked that they decided to pre-emptively throw a lavish house party, Rita Ora style, whilst the country was still in the midst of Lockdown II: Down and Out in Lockdown City.
The Whip caught up with irresponsible reveller Justin Kace to find out more.
“Firstly, I’d like to say, no comment. But secondly, I’d like to say, it was only about 30 people AND we operated a strict one in one out policy when we danced the Hokey Cokey at 5:30am. Is it bad to throw a house party while we’re still in Lockdown? Undoubtedly yes. But we just got so over excited at the thought of being allowed back into gyms that we exercised our right to a pre gym opening boogie.”
Whilst The Whip strongly condemn such brazen acts of medical defiance, and question the validity of pre-emptive celebration, we have uncovered similar such events from the annals of history.
In the 1954 FA Cup final for instance, Preston North End pre-emptively celebrated defeating West Bromwich Albion 3-0 a week before the final took place, only to lose the final 3-2. Whilst at the 2008 Oscars, a confident Graham Norton threw himself a ‘Best Director Winner’ party two weeks earlier than the ceremony, before being deemed ineligible for the award as he had never directed a film in his life.
What can we learn from these events? You work it out I’m not here to spoon feed you like some massive idiot baby.