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Durdham freshers issued with lifetime supply of single condom
Just one single ribbed condom will suffice.
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First overeager fresher arrives at Motion
‘Haha no, but seriously, I’m sure all of my future mates in Clifton Hill House will be doing the same soon.’
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Ex-state school student accidentally attends University of Bristol ski trip
‘How can the powder be ‘classic’? Surely it’s new snow?’
Bristol
Eton issues leavers UoB starter pack: tracksuit, gold chain, DJ decks
Eton College has reportedly commenced the issuing of A-level students with a ‘starter pack’ for their arrival at the University of Bristol as part of
Bristol
Students more likely to be struck by lightning en route to ASS Library than find desk once there
In a breaking report from the MET Office it has emerged that students at the University of Bristol have a greater chance of being thrashed
Bristol
Freshers blinded by floodlights at Gravity’s ‘Lit Monday’
Gravity, previously of ‘Bunker’ fame, suffered an unprecedented PR disaster at their inaugural student night on Monday as their literal interpretation of the term ‘Lit
Bristol
Interview: UoB post-grad confirms FemSoc ‘absolutely crawling with gash’
A postgraduate student at the University of Bristol has revealed he joined the Feminist Society to ‘meet women’. Unaware of the organisation’s purpose, the second
Bristol
Fresher devastated as Nigerian Prince fails to send LSTD ticket
She never received the email.
Bristol
Noise conscious student pre-moistens crisps before entering ASS Library
Reports are coming in this morning of a fresher vigorously licking his Walker’s Cheese and Onion crisps outside the Arts and Social Sciences Library in
Bristol
Durdham chronic virginity epidemic continues
Reports from the University suggest that the outbreak of virginity in Durdham has reached epidemic levels, with almost all students in the Stoke Bishop hall
Bristol
Economics exam scheduled at Temple Meads, platform 6
Unsatisfied with only inconveniencing students with an exam at Temple Meads, the Economics faculty went one infuriating step further by relocating ‘Introduction to Quantitative Easing’ to
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- 1Greta delivers earth-shattering Motion techno set during Bristol visit
- 2North London fresher’s attempt to start anew ruined as entire sixth form moves to Bristol
- 3Bristol boy’s head explodes as he realises Champions League clashes with LSTD
- 4‘Yeah I’ve seen B2B before, he’s a sick DJ’, claims fresher trying to fit in
- 5‘The Noise Pages’ takes matters into their own hands, burns down High Kingsdown